


Souda's Very Upsettting Birthday

by TeruTeruObliterator11037



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Birthday Party, Gen, I am back and sorrier than ever, It's the birthday of my oldest son, Komaedalovemail - Freeform, So many obscure references, despacito, you know what that means
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 15:24:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15099578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeruTeruObliterator11037/pseuds/TeruTeruObliterator11037
Summary: Souda celebrates his birthday with the help of an iPhone X and a close friend!





	Souda's Very Upsettting Birthday

**Author's Note:**

> Guten Abend! I am back at last!  
> It took me a while to return, as I needed to focus on putting my life together. Luckily, it's sort of falling into place. I am very excited about something I'll be posting in the next month of so, so sit tight. However, my chances of having internet are slim, so who knows! Anyways, it is lovely to be back!  
> Enough about me, enjoy the show!

"hey hinata hey hey hinata hey", called a young man named souda kazoochi, to his friend hajmmy hinata

"what"

"K N I F E"

 

"excuse me?"

"nah wait let me start over. whats good soulfriend?"

"nothing much, just trying to solve a murder'

"haha have you solved the murder of your nonexistent talent"

_**"Listen Here, You Shark Toothed Inkling B oy Lookin Crusty Fake Nike Flexing Nasty Jumpsuit Wearing Minion Loving Fri*ck. At Least I Have B asic Social Skills. And What Do You Do? That's Right. B uild B icycles And Spill B eans All Over Yourself While Watching Cars 2."** _

"haha, EPic Meme B ro! you wanna come to my b irthday party?"

"uh sure, but i wanna finess chiakis heart first"

"b ruh then what are we gonna do?"

"i have an idea"

"whats that"

"ill call four random people and see if theyll come celeb rate"

"why onyl  ~~three~~ fou ~~r~~?"

"b ecause the authors short on time"

"understandable. have a nice day."

"then lets get roooiiiiight into the news

first person," hinata began to type rapidly onto his iphone x, "iiiisssss sonia"

"Ah Yes!  **S O N I A  S A N  H O U R S"**

 **"** shes finna friendzone you."

"nah, iss 2018, we all know that friendzoning is a lie made up by the government"

"alrght then, dont say i didnt warn you"

 

(souda is now on the phone)

"Sonia Nevermind speaking, what is good Souda?"

"i have feelings for youse"

"yeah. you do." (flip phone CLACK)

"come to my party?"

"Nah, too b usy watching 

a n i m e"

" **ah gee"**

_b eeeeeeeeeeeeeep_

_"_ so," hinata inquired, "howd it go?"\

"less move on"

"whatever you say, just give me the phone. you owe me an orange juce loan"

he proceeded to type n more numb ers

"its saonji, best of luck squadfam"

(he is now on the phone)

"It’s Lil Hiyoko, and lemme tell y’all something. This stuff cost more than your rent, my toilet cost more than your rent, everything in my b athroom cost more than your rent, and see, this my closet. Everything in here be Desiigner, Gucci, Louis, Versace. And, also, when I was six years old, I lived in Atlanta, and I was b roke as HECC! B ut one day, I woke up and I said to myself, “I ain’t gonna be b roke no more,” and so I got up and started working hard, moving b ricks, and we b e livin’ in the hills. See that view right there? Y’all don’t have that view, and I be holdin’ yo momma’s rent. This b ed cost me a Lamb orghini, and I worked hard! So if y’all worked hard, you can accomplish your dreams, just like I did."

"quit CYBERB ULLYING ME"

_b eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep_

_"_ NEXT!"

"ok, komaedas on the phone"

(he is now on the phone please i need to feed my children)

"good morning ~souda kun~"

"dont make me smack you b ecause i will not hesitate"

"heard you were throwing a ( ͡° ͜◯ ͡°) ＣＬＯＷＮ ＦＩＥＳＴＡ ( ͡° ͜◯ ͡°)"

"i swear"

"going out for the day, hide your girl"

"please komaeda i cant lose her again"

"time to take this out b ack.heh. upstaiurs. ha. round the circus. ha. time to. ha. remove. hooh/ time to get us out of .haaa/ time for us to go. lool "

_b eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeimadissapointmenteeeeeep_

"alright shishter hinata, hit that dial, my day could not get any worse"

"oooooh"

"wuzzat"

"epic gamer chiaki nanami"

"aight"

 

(he is on the phone)

"hey chiaki, come to my party?"

"With the glass ceiling b roken, all the oppressed groups shall prosper.

Especially the most oppressed group of all:

_**G A M E R S"** _

 

 

 

*breaking noise*

"This Is So Sad." souda weeped, "Alexa, Play Despacito."

 

*You Have Now Been Disconnected From This Fic. Please Rest. You Must B e Very Tired*

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry its a little weak, but I Hope you enjoyed! (Also, the despacito quote is my friend's creative genius, not mine! All credit goes to him.)   
> Comments are always welcome! And as always, stay fresh!


End file.
